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The "Wokening" of the Celtics


Arguably the biggest news of the entire summer was Cavaliers point guard and NBA finals hero Kyrie Irving demanding a trade. When the news broke everyone was absolutely puzzled. Who in their right mind doesn't want to play with debatably the best player of all time? Well we're not so sure Kyrie is in his right mind so we've got to give him that. If you are "very much woke" then you're probably up to speed on Irving's theories about the world we live in, everything from the earth being flat to the questionable comments about the moon landing's validity. Nearly everything we've heard from Kyrie has had me scratching my head, what could he be thinking? Well some people attribute his desire to leave Cleveland to his "Mamba Mentality" and his admiration for Kobe Bryant which inspired him to make his own way, to escape the shadow of the King and to challenge himself with a new team, sure, I can buy that, but did you see his list of preferred destinations? The Knicks? Really? (Hindsight is 20/20)

Eventually he got what he wanted, however ill advised. Kyrie was shipped to Boston in exchange for Isaiah Thomas (dick move Danny Ainge), Jae Crowder, Ante Zizic, Bostons 2018 first round pick (from Brooklyn) and a 2020 second rounder. Quite the package.

The fallout from the trade was messy, the Celtics did Thomas wrong after giving them everything he had during the playoffs despite his sister's passing and a faltering hip, (I wonder if they sent him a thank you card?) but in the end Kyrie had what he wanted, his own team. He'd have to prove it was his team though, he'd be sharing the court with Gordon Hayward and Al Horford, sort of a "biggish 3". Though not quite as exciting as the Garnett, Pierce, Allen days the Celtics are looking fierce again. The team looked deep with young talent mixed with some bonafide stars that would be fun to watch. I couldn't wait for opening night. Celtics vs Cavs. Hell yeah... Hell no.

Six minutes in and everybody who had tuned in for the long awaited opening night found themselves cringing in disgust as Hayward hit the deck and the cameras caught the most gruesome angle of a mangled looking ankle. That was it, there goes his season, there goes the Celtics large ambitions. The game's tone was changed entirely and the animosity we thought we'd see between Kyrie and the King had dissipated. The Cavs won easily and the Celtics hopes we're dashed. Unfortunately for them they had to recover quick and as expected they didn't. Their season started with a double header which found them playing the Bucks the very next night and losing by eight. Not the start anyone had hoped for, optimism had turned to despair for Boston fans.

If ever there was a time for Kyrie to do what he came to Boston to do it was now. You want to carry a team? Oh boy, here's a good place to start and start he did. Its hard to believe but the Celtics have not lost since. Sitting at 10-2 the Celtics are on top of the east and truly do look like the best team in the conference. I guess you could say the Celtics are actually "Woke". Can they keep it up? I hope so, I want nothing more than to see a Celtics/Cavs eastern conference finals. In the meantime I have some questions for Kyrie. What is it that planes are dropping on us with those chem trail things? Where do crop circles come from? Area 51? The Celtics are a magnificent 9-0 since he told a fan to "suck my dick", how do I incorporate this attitude into my daily life to find success? So many questions but so far Kyrie has had all the answers.


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